Wednesday, October 17, 2012

coaching

houndstooth check shift from julie; i wore it for two consecutive days because i miss julie soooo much!
at the end of the artist's way, you commit to continuing morning pages, artist dates, and to checking in weekly with an artist's coach.  (i love morning pages; i hate artist dates and just can't make myself do them.)

i'm super glad i have a coach to check in with, because the past few days have been some of the hardest, the tightest, of 2012.  and yesterday i thought i might fall apart completely.  it was one of those days where i had to talk myself through every breath, every step, of the day.

anyone else ever have those days?

i talked to my coach last night and she told me a bunch of stuff i kind of already know (except for number 3--that's new and i'm gonna try it), but it's different to hear another voice telling you besides your own inner voice, which under difficult circumstances can get muddled and confused.

my coach told me:

1) you already know what to do.

2) ride the wave.  hard times and good times both are fleeting.

3) draw your story on a whiteboard. (i need to do more investigating on this.  it seems like something my whole family could use!)

so,

do you have a coach?

if not, you should.

my coach is one of my dearest friends, a relative, and a person who has unofficially helped me through more difficulties than i can possibly count--including being a labor coach at two of my births.  she's just super talented at coaching.

i also have a few people i think about when specific problems arise--i try to imagine what that person would do when faced with a challenge i know that person is good at handling.  i think about my very organized and practical sister when i'm getting too complicated.  i think about julie when i'm getting dressed and i know my outfit isn't quite right.  i think about ingrid when i want my life to be more magical.  i think of c. when i'm trying to find a workaround for a seemingly intractable problem--he's a genius at that.  i think of eva when i feel like i'm not entitled to ask for what i want or need.  i think of bam when i'm trying to infuse my day with structure, fun, and meaning.

i could go on and on with this list.

the point is, i guess i've used self-coaching for a long time, unconsciously, but it's really interesting to do it more deliberately and with more awareness.

i also did s.o.l.e. on monday and tuesday to try to get through those days.  i'm sure it made me feel better, like, merely horrible rather than completely hideous.  & i wore the houndstooth shift julie sent back from nyc with c. BOTH days.  it just made me feel good to wear something from julie, since we're so far apart geographically.

on monday i wore it with burgandy tights from h&m, the only tights purchase i've made this year, and on tuesday the charcoal tights from last winter, my go-to tights.  with a putty colored crocheted scarf/shawl because it was chilly and overcast yesterday.  i think i liked yesterday's look a little better than monday's.

it's time to fire up every last coping strategy in my tool bag to get through the next super tough eight weeks.

i'm open to ideas, ladies.  or gentleman.

2 comments:

  1. you look sooo fab in that dress, and i don't think it's too short! the top is so demure, that the shortness works, i think. oh, i totes need a coach! how can i get one?

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  2. Hmm.

    I've been flying solo too long.

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